President Obama’s use of teleprompters in every talk is becoming legendary; he hauled a gaggle of them on his European trip, all programmed to say what might spontaneously come to the teleprompter’s mind. That still didn’t save him from screwing up: The media went ape when he bowed to the King of Saudi Arabia. The most powerful sovereign in the world doesn’t go around bowing and scraping to minor oil kings. However, if I had as little experience with protocol as Obama I would probably have bowed to both the king and the horse he rode in on. Especially if my middle name was Hussein and I wanted oil.

I don’t know where Democrats find people who dislike the United States to run for President – Michelle Obama got the campaign in trouble when she announced she was ashamed of our country until it nominated her husband. She hasn’t said much since then; I believe they wired her jaws shut to eliminate further eloquence. Still, Obama ran around Europe with his teleprompter apologizing for our country to everyone.

His inability to speak without teleprompters reminds me of the Yankee ventriloquist who kept a Texas audience in stitches with jokes denigrating Southerners until a huge, angry galoot in the third row stood up and shouted, “You badmouth us Southerners one more time and I’ll come up there and whup you good!”

After the ventriloquist apologized, the man shouted, “You stay out of this Mr., I’m talking to that little blabbermouth sitting on your lap.”

Even as an ignorant country yokel, I wouldn’t make that mistake. If I wanted to shut up Obama, I’d say, “You badmouth the United States one more time and I’m going to whup that blabbermouth teleprompter.” Do you suppose a secret serviceman is programmed to leap in front to save the teleprompter? With the teleprompter dead would Obama be mute?

Randy Ridgel lives in Kelseyville.